Experiences

The First of Firsts – My First Flight

Jeanna GLeave a comment

This is the first in what will be a series of firsts.

I ran a summer camp for the past seven weeks, and one of the ice breakers we played was “Never Have I Ever.” This is a great game to stimulate your memory and go back in time. The kids responded “Never” or “Have” to events like riding in a limo, eating food off the floor, and being sent to the principal’s office. The kids all wanted to share their stories, which were usually pretty hilarious, and their sharing revived quite a few stories of the silly stuff I have done. So now and in future posts I’ll share some of my firsts, in no particular order.

In 6th grade I took my first flight. I was traveling to visit my friend whose family had a house on Chic’s Beach along the Chesapeake Bay. While there, my friend and I decided to steal a cigarette out of her grandmother’s purse, run what felt like a mile from the house into a wooded area on the beach, and smoke our first cigarette together. It was a menthol. I remember being totally freaked out that we were going to get in trouble, but I also remember giggling uncontrollably.

I’m sitting here thinking I need to apologize or explain or give excuses or point out that it wasn’t my idea, but that would just make the whole experience different from what it should be. And what was it? It was fun. And I’m not sorry, I have no regrets.

I think a lot of emphasis is put on firsts. First word, first step, first tooth, first tooth lost, first haircut, and fast-forward to first date, first kiss. We want to remember them, so they need to be memorable. The trouble with that is we can become very disappointed if they don’t turn out the way we hoped, or if our stories don’t measure up.

And we also want our firsts to be first; I started walking before you, or I started playing soccer at a younger age than you. And then everything becomes a race, a competition.

When we played the game with the kids, we had to create new rules that involved raising hands and waiting to be called on if they wanted to share because we got caught up in a cycle of one-upping. The point of the game was to get to know one another, but everyone was shouting out their stories at the same time, and no one was listening to each other. They were excited to share, but it was also as if they had something to prove, and I’m not entirely sure why that is.

If I could go back in time, I would put more emphasis on the ‘who’ than the ‘how’ for my firsts. I think that as long as you’re with the people who you share love with in the moment, the memory will be a good one. Then, if you continue to surround yourself with loved ones, there’s no competition, just sharing your lives with each other. Part of what makes a moment worth remembering is who you were with at that time. And another part is to remind you how you got here.

What are the firsts that you remember?

Setting Up Camp, Part 2

Jeanna G1 Comment

Back in May I made a promise to my daughter that I would bring camp to her since her summer camp had been cancelled. It took some time to plan and prep, but this is what we did:

The week that she was registered to attend had the theme of “Christmas in July,” so while she was sleeping I strung colored lights along the ceiling of her bedroom, hung a gift-filled stocking on her closet door, and sprinkled individually wrapped candies across her furnishings. In the morning, I did rouse her with reveille, but then a Christmas playlist jingled its way into the room. We sang along as she opened her stocking that was filled with gimp and dollar store trinkets.

She was so excited to get the day started, and filled with candy, so we skipped breakfast and went straight into her first activity: baking. She said brownies and cupcakes were always offered at camp as desserts, so she helped me make both.

Next came one of my favorite camp activities: leather working. We moistened leather strap bracelets, stamped them with designs, then stained and sheened them.

Considering the theme, I wanted to include a Christmas craft, so we made waterless snow globes. I bought my first glue gun for this craft, so I feel like a full fledged member of the crafting world now. We glued small foam squares into the screw-on lids of glass jars to serve as pedestals for the figurines. Then we glued small snow-covered evergreens and snowmen to the foam. (The remaining trees will be perfect for the train set that we plan to build together!) We poured fake snow and Christmas colored glitter into the jars, and then inverted the lids, screwed them on, shook them up, and voilà!

Chinese food was one of her favorite lunches from camp, so we ordered carry-out before continuing on with our craft activities. To the tune of the Addam’s Family theme song we prayed:

“We’ve filled our bowls and dishes – with food that is delicious – you’ve granted all our wishes – God thank you very much!”

After lunch we had a siesta, which was a part of my summer camp experience. Campers would write letters home or read while the counselors geared up for the evening programs. As mom/counselor, I just needed to rest my eyes for a bit.

The next craft was a continuation of something we had started during stay-at-home orders. As I’d mentioned in my post titled “Expanding Time,” my daughter and I went on many springtime strolls and had plenty of time to stop and smell the flowers. We collected and pressed small blossoms that we spotted along the way. I did the same with petals from the Mother’s Day carnations she gifted me. Our craft was to arrange the pressings into small frames. We are both very happy with the results, and they help to shine a light of gratitude on our memories of this pandemic.

Next came wood burning. I bought small pieces of wood for a dollar from Michael’s that are very easy to burn designs into.

Our final activity was making friendship bracelets with embroidery thread and key chains with gimp while watching Elf.

Dinner was unique, to say the least. She had described a spaghetti burrito that I was not so sure about, but she devoured what we made! “ABCDEFG – Thank you God for feeding me!” was the blessing.

Flour tortilla wrapped around spaghetti mixed with butter, sour cream, & shredded cheese.

I have more planned, but some of the activities require the participation of my friend’s children. We were going to run the games at our annual lake trip, but it was hard to compete with the activities that were already available to us: paddle boarding, kayaking, swimming, and floating. We’ve decided to host a day of camp one weekend soon, which I’ll be sure to post as Part 3.

Even though we didn’t play the games at the lake, we were still able to add in the sweetness of S’mores around a campfire and spend some time stargazing. No meteor showers, but we did see a shooting star and were able to locate the comet Neowise! It’s not the best photo, but it’s good enough.

Neowise!

So it wasn’t a week away with a cabin full of bunk mates, but she seems to be a happy camper, nonetheless.

What activities would you plan for a camp-at-home experience?

Highlights

Jeanna GLeave a comment

I often wonder what my daughter will remember most about her childhood. Will it be good stuff that comes to mind first? Will there be a year filled with more goodness than others? Will it be a slideshow of snippets, or will the big events get the spotlight? I’ve taken her on so many adventures, but already, at the age of eight, she tells me she doesn’t remember things we’ve done. We flew to Chicago when she was two. While there we danced with our reflections in The Bean, took in views from the 98th floor of the Hancock Building, rode the Navy Pier’s Centennial Wheel…. she doesn’t remember any of it. I’m like, “Ellie, that was only six years ago.” But nope, nothing.

Centennial Wheel -A cold and windy ride in November!

To be honest, I don’t remember much before pre-school either, which seems to be the norm. What I do remember from my childhood and adolescence tends to fall into one of two categories: what happened in school versus what happened outside of school, mostly grouped by grade level.

Reflecting on my school years, a motley crew of memories come to mind. In pre-school I played dress up during free time (always in the same dress), and we took a field trip to see Sesame Street on Ice. In Kindergarten I painted a lot of rainbows, and I lost a tooth while waiting in line to get on the bus. At home, my mom ran a daycare, and she and I would watch Days of Our Lives while her charges took their naps. In first grade I spelled ‘enough’ wrong on a spelling test (enof). I also had a best friend named Vanessa who lived down the road. I remember we were playing in her sandbox when a snake slithered past us in the grass. She was terrified, so I (at age 6) carried her across the lawn to her back door. She moved to the Dakotas that year, and I never heard from her again. In second grade we had an incubator in our classroom, but the power went out and the chicken eggs never hatched. In third grade we read A Midsummer Night’s Dream. I wrote a poem about walking through leaves in the fall with my grandma that my teacher read aloud to the class, and I felt very proud. I learned how to whistle and shuffle a deck of cards. In fourth grade I made it to the spelling bee. My dad sat in the front row. My stint ended with the word ‘opportunity.’ To this day, I think it’s unfair to have a pronouncer with a Boston accent. I met two of my longest-lasting, closest friends that year. In fifth grade, I passed my cursive test, so I was allowed to practice calligraphy. I also had an appendectomy. Over those years we took family trips to Prince Edward Island, Disney, and Wells, Maine. Middle school was team sports, dances, the trip to D.C., and mall walking. High school was my sweetheart, clubs, sports, jobs, driving, and parties. The holidays were always filled with traditions; church, menus, decorations.

The more I reflect, the more I remember, but I find it peculiar that these are what come to mind first. They fall into such a wide range of experiences from the mundane to eye-opening, heart-breaking to joy-filled, painful to therapeutic. Some things I don’t think I would remember at all if it weren’t for my friends and family reminding me, and even then I question if we’re remembering an event the same way. Related to this, I’ve been keeping a journal for my daughter since I found out I was pregnant. Every few months I jot down what we’ve been up to, what she’s learning, how she’s growing, milestones, etc. I know it’s biased because it’s what I think is important for her to remember, what I want to remember, and my unique recollection of those moments. I’ve learned that our memories are stored based on what we saw, heard, felt, and understood in the moment, so she will have slightly different versions of the same stories. And this is why I take a ton of pictures and record videos so she can revisit the moments as they were. I want her to remember all of the good things and none of the bad, but I know that isn’t possible.

So will her highlights steal the show, or will she allow them to shine light on the bigger picture? All of our experiences, the memorable and not-so, have made us who we are, and it’s important to honor them all. Everything we’ve done and learned affect our everyday decisions, our automatic and unconscious thoughts, as well as helping us to navigate new situations in our own ways. Whether my daughter remembers all of our adventures, or not, I know that they have made an impact. Altogether they have made her who she is, and make up what she knows, and they’ve enriched both of our lives. I look forward to witnessing how she will relive her memories with her child, too.

How do you categorize your childhood memories? What are your highlights?