My family has been betting on the ponies for at least four generations. My mom and grandpa used to bet quarters on who would win. My mom would always pick who looked best going onto the field, usually number 8. I don’t know how my grandpa picked, but he usually won. I watched the races because my mom did, and I picked whatever number or name was sounding lucky that day. That’s how my daughter picks now, too.
My uncle liked to bet, too, so he and I would chat about our picks prior to the race. He taught me more about how to pick besides colors, names, and numbers. In the last Triple Crown race before he passed, I finally picked a winner, Sir Winston in the 2019 Belmont Stakes.
In 2020, Covid pushed the races back to the fall, so my friends and I watched the race during our beach trip and got the kids all hyped up about it by having them draw a horse out of a hat. In 2021, I found a friend who also enjoys the races and she makes an amazing beer cheese dip, and her husband makes a perfect mint julep, so we enjoyed the Derby together. This year I picked Epicenter to win the Derby but the long-shot horse my daughter picked beat mine by three-quarters of a length. I think that win was enough for her to continue our family tradition.
Tonight is the Preakness stakes, which I attended about 15 years ago. If I ever make it to the Belmont stakes or the Kentucky Derby, I will definitely buy seats in the grandstand, because the infield at Pimlico was nothing I want to re-experience. But for now I’ll continue to watch the Triple Crown on TV and bet on the ponies with my daughter, and hopefully my uncle and grandpa will send a little luck down from above.
The theme of my blog posts is “finding happiness by wandering back to youth.” I’ve written before that I’m able to re-experience my childhood simply by playing with my child. I love introducing her to games I used to play, places I’ve been, and other activities in which I’ve participated. As a parent I experience déjà vu often; I re-live events, but this time around I get to do so through the spirit of my child, while reawakening my own child-like spirit.
As mentioned in my previous post, my daughter and I just traveled to Puerto Vallarta, Mexico for vacation. It was her first time leaving her home country; the first stamp in her passport. I knew the trip would be special, even if we just sat by the pool all day, but I wanted unique, unforgettable adventures for us. I didn’t want to be so busy going out to find food that we wouldn’t have time for fun, so I decided we would stay at an all-inclusive resort. I chose the Hotel Riu Palace Pacifico in the state of Nayarit. Everyone there was so friendly and accommodating. It was clean, and the food and drinks were delicious and plentiful.
The first day we took a taxi to Aquaventuras water park for a Dolphin Encounter. It was a Bucket List item for both of us. We stood side-by-side in the pool, and pet and played with Quintus the dolphin. To be able to enjoy the experience with my daughter, and to know she is just as grateful for the experience as I am, is a dream come true. We paid extra for the professional photos of our encounter, but we were allowed to stay and enjoy the water slides and a free lunch, so it all balanced out.
Bucket List: ✅
Afterwards, we took another cab downtown to the Malecón, a boardwalk with shopping, restaurants, and beautiful sculptures to enjoy. You can shop inside stores, or purchase items from the artists selling at outdoor stands. This is a great way to feel the city.
Sights on the Malecón
The next day we took a cab to meet the owner of Rancho El Charro, who then drove us the rest of the way to her horse ranch. When I traveled to the Dominican Republic back in 1998, my sister booked a horse ride along the beach, and it was such a wonderful experience, that I wanted my daughter to also have the opportunity. She and I rode into the Sierra Madres on a three-hour tour. It was so peaceful and beautiful, and she loved it.
If there’s a different mode of travel available to see the sights, take it!
Our last full day was to be spent relaxing by the pool and taking a dip in the Pacific. She had seen other girls getting their hair braided on the beach and asked if she could get her hair done. In the DR, I also got my hair braided, and loved it, so I just couldn’t say no. Afterwards, she met up with another 9-year old girl who was staying at the resort. They met the day we arrived and became fast friends. I had purchased a waterproof case for my phone, so they wanted to take some underwater photos in the pool. One photo had an uncanny resemblance to one of me taken over 20 years ago…
Double Take!
We left the next morning, but my daughter was desperate to say goodbye to her new friend. I couldn’t help but be reminded of the last time I saw my friend, Vanessa, back in first grade. My mom helped me to search high and low for her at the airport, with the hunt ending in a ladies restroom with a hug and a fracture in my heart. This is when it hurts to know how much my daughter is like me: we both love easily, making goodbyes that much harder. I stood by watching them hug goodbye, neither wanting to be the first to let go. She cried as I walked her to our taxi under my arm.
Fast Friends
Sometimes it’s heartwarming, and sometimes it creates heartache… seeing my reflection in the life of my child. I may have been where she is before, but together our feelings create a harmony, making a richer and brighter cover of an old song. Even the sad times are worth experiencing again, because it reminds me of my own wealth of emotions and ability to feel deeply and completely. If not for the capability to empathize, how else could I really share these experiences with my daughter?
Happy or sad, my memories make me who I am. And sometimes I like to be reminded of who that person truly is. This is why I make time to rendezvous with déjà vu.
As a kid, fun was always spontaneous. Kids walk into a room, see other kids, and they become fast friends. Then they’re off playing make-believe and having a blast. Most of my childhood was spent playing outdoors. My friend and I would start a game of kickball or HORSE, and kids would just come and go and join in when they wanted. Play was free.
Nowadays, I still play, but if I want to play with my friends, it has to be planned. We usually have to book a reservation, put it on our calendars, hire a babysitter (unless the activity is kid-friendly), think about carpooling, and there’s almost always a fee just to participate. There’s a red wine I enjoy, and its cork reads, “Plan some spontaneity.” That cracks me up! But that’s what play has become as an adult; organized fun.
But thankfully, there’s a whole market out there for entertaining adults (I’m referring to the G-rated market!). My friends and I booked reservations to complete a treetop ropes course, escape a room, a zip line adventure through the Appalachians, and pottery painting at a local studio. This past Friday we booked an hour of axe throwing. It was so fun! Now I’m trying to talk my friends into doing one of those ‘drink wine and everybody paint the same thing’ events.
No, fun isn’t as free and spontaneous as it used to be, but it’s good to know that there are people out there who love to play, and are creating opportunities for you to join in the fun. This past year of stay-at-home orders, quarantining, and social distancing has not made fun easy, but don’t get stuck in a boring routine of sitting in front of your television. Free yourself from the confines of a boring adulthood! Do a search, call some friends, and plan some organized fun!
What’s an activity you loved to participate in as a kid? Can you plan to do it with some friends?
Juvenescent Junkets 